Monday, September 24, 2012

The origin of cellars.

The cellar doors were not always the cellars that we know and love today.  In fact even a professional team saf rider would not be able to recognize a prehistoric cellar. I have done a lot of research... and I have the come to conclude that cellar doors are of the reptilian class. 

Medieval cellars are crocodiles and alligators.  They swim in swamps and let birds eat off their tongues.  Steven Irwin was one of the most influential originators of cellar appreciation and study. 

In one study dun scientists found a family of alligators with nose rings in a thorn-protected marsh.  Sum guy noticed that the nose rings on the alligators was the primitive form of locks on cellar doors and most likely this is what caused most cellar doors to reside inside fences.

Cellar doors in today’s society usually have owners, unless it is an abandoned cellar. Cellars usually have a life span of 150 years.  You can usually approximate the age by examining the cracks of the paint on the cellar, and looking for rust and decay.  Cellar doors are necessary for east coast infrastructure because of the need for basements.  You know.. i believe that cellar doors could be the solution for the economy.

A cellar doors' sound is extremely distinct.  When a cellar speaks, a fellow cellar can distinguish and hear which one of its kind is saying what.  Wooden cellars usually use sonar and thump sounds, while diamond plated and metal ones splash with symbol sounds.  Scientists still cannot decipher what they are saying, because the language is so complex. 

Cellar doors are social characters.  A cellar is usually found within the vicinity of another cellar.  However it is not uncommon for a cellar to be the only prominent cellar in the area. But wait just one hilly billy seconde, idiot.  In a urban environment you step on cellars every day!  Cellars are very diverse and come in all shapes, sizes, and dimensions.  

Flat cellars are cellars, that when closed, are adjacent with the ground.  Flat cellars are the most common form of cellars because it is the most adapted for survival.  A cellar, metaphysically, avoids confrontation and never attacks, unless you initiate contact with it.  Some cellars in certain "cellar developed areas" are all flat cellars.  Cellars are devious.

However some cellars are straight up ostentatious!  For example, a bright red, flamboyant cellar is like a big tittyied sexy woman!  Small cellars, large cellars, tall cellars, short cellars, polish, jewish, african, puerto rican,  chinese cellars, whateva.   i love them all! 

Look around, cellars are everywhere. nah men.

What specimen!  Look at the zeal.

1 comment: