Friday, August 31, 2012

LOCALLY GROWN UNDER CELLAZ

good thing carter, darian, nic, and myself rode 4 pegs before we realized we should hide our goofyfootedness, we coulda ended up like our boy in this pic... 



carter in 2007


darian in 07



nic in 07



my dumbass in 2007


...nvm we did

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

frequently dusted

 unfortunately these members of team saf were put in front of a firing squad. they all survived to icepick unwaxed ledges another day
 street riding is getting too mainstream
 protection against homophobes
 out of commision for right now
 dont let your kids breathe exhaust, just get them dusted
 team saf is going on megatour 89
 foreshadowing.... next day carter tore his hand apart while we were trying to get dusted in a treacherous area in yonkers
 but we also get dusted in the most beautiful places

 drunk russian guy in the bodega claims his wife took this photo, others claim it was in the new york times. shooter on 34th street laid the fuck out 
 fire department installed a hydrant in kevs apartment due to frequent pcp related fires
dust makes you crave some weird ass shit

Monday, August 27, 2012


chapter 2

When Evan woke up he was in an empty gym locker room.  He had no shoes on and he couldn’t tell if what he was stepping on was pee or if it was water.  All he could find was a wet white tee shirt, so he rapped that around his foot; it felt glutinous.  He was looking for a mirror because he believed that if he looked in a mirror he would snap out of it and escape the cold teal tile of the locker room. He felt crazy because he couldn't relate anything with anyone and everything.  Alone and distressed he started to whimper and fart as if he had to hide the sound from someone. at the same time. 
There was no one alive on team saf besides for evan because everyone on teamsaf had changed.  Most of the teamsaf members became addicted to the powerful drug "wackshiff" and became so dumb that Evan had to kick them off.  The only surviving members of teamsaf were the Ohio affiliates because they are straight edge.  However They left saf because they realized that Evan wasn’t even that cool.  Evan realized that he lost his ambition.
"Agh I'm so unmotivated to do sum shit. Maybe it's because I haven't seen a cella in soo long."
He kept his cool and let himself think of which direction to move.
However before he could decide what to do, agents came in and hit him over the head with a mallet. Evan tries to bandage his gushing head with his fingers but the men in beige and shinny shoes grab him by the dick and the nose, demanding to know about the underground cellar door revival.
"heey hey! I don't know what your talking about!"
"Sure shure cowboy. sure u don’t u fuck!"
The bro wacked Evan with the mallet right in the knee, just to be a douche.
"ahhwee!"
One of the pigs grabs him by the curls and spits in his face.
"we know ur involved with this shit, they dropped a nuclear bomb, with your face on it, on the mitt romney memorial"
Evan thought to himself, "daym. They really did that, awesome. I wish I weren't such a coward and declined to join the cellar door revival Years ago when they nominated me as one fifteenth of their democratic group. Honestly I thought the world was gonna end and it wasn’t gonna be worth it but whateves.."
And while he was thinking they injected him with an extremely strong drug and threw him into a computer jail cell.

Chapter 1


In the year 2050 New Jersey and New York are entirely flat.  It was part of Mayor Georgina Bloomberg’s Mountain Shave Act of 2028.  There are no banks. Architectural laws have been enacted that prohibit the construction of any diagonal planes. People are only allowed to move up and down, and left and right because space has become limited due to over population.  Additionally, because of drastic changes in climate, the outside world has become uninhabitable.  Everyone on the east coast lives in Freedom Tower, which is an enormous structure that spans from Cape May to White Plains to Bridgeport.  Everywhere else is decimated.  Artificial sunlight heats the people and is controlled by the tower’s operator, Walt Disney, who suffers severe brain trauma.  All food is synthesized from the recycled materials of our waste.  All water is absorbed through pores we have developed due to extreme humidity.  There is a constant mist in the air to hydrate the people, because the people have forgotten how to swallow liquid.  When people want to get drunk they have to spray themselves with liquor.  The operator constantly monitors the tower using audio and video recording devices which have become oppressively sophisticated.  Everyone is aware of every action and word that occurs so that everyone is confused by the echoes of the past.  Moments of clarity are only experienced by the chosen one, Evan Gallagher.  No one can perceive anything because it is like everyone is always high on crack.  Newport and Exxon partnered up and now make slow burning cigarettes, slow burning male and female enhancement cigarettes, and long burning eye drops. People have also evolved smoking holes in their left armpits so that smoke can go directly into their lungs.  Every girl looks like an Eskimo and every boy looks like Barbra Streisand, except for Evan Gallagher. 

Evan Gallagher, sort of a brute, is the only surviving team Saf member.  All he does is talk about You Had Your Chance 2 and Odvd, which he claims will drop around 2055, vehemently to anyone who listens.  His cavernous eyes, fatigued by many monotonous badwitits are bloodshot because he just smoked paper.  Straight paper is the only remaining organic source of smoke known to exist.  He just smoked a rolled up page of enders game because he realized that book is stupid.  The police are about to come; he shouldn't have smoked paper.  Evan begins to smoke a newport to cover the smell.  However, with pain in his brain and thoughts about to arise, he collapses on his aspirations and falls back into a dream, his lips quivering “safyo cellas” as he doses off into piss water.

THUNDERKILL Video on Vimeo... Someday?

Really looking forward to seeing this video once Charles gets it uploaded... his internet is shite right now from watching to much porn so its taking a long while... peep the Thunderkill site while we all patiently wait... if it works.

top secret...

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Jolly Mon Singing in Cape Cod

Went to Wellfeet with my family for a week
Met up with Bobo in Woodshole
Went to Walmart for the first time in my life. Hit a bunch of tennis balls across the store

Bobos great aunts ill house


Rip off and rip off of a rip off
the seal smoked to much so he needed eyedrops
only halfway decent spot I could find

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Team Saf glows in the dark.

http://project.wnyc.org/census-maps/nyc-income/index.html?lat=40.7323&lon=-73.8712&zoom=12

History

Around 180 million years ago, during the Jurassic Period, New Jersey bordered North Africa. The pressure of the collision between North America and Africa gave rise to the Appalachian Mountains. Around 18,000 years ago, the Ice Age resulted in glaciers that reached New Jersey. As the glaciers retreated, they left behind Lake Passaic, as well as many rivers, swamps, and gorges.[17]

workcited - wikipedia duhhh


new jersey is america. new york borders new jersey.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Vacation at the SAF House pt2

High Life
This dude was getting arrested at the Path Train for drinking Colt45 concealed in a paper cup
Rosie and Carter were seeing who could feeble furthest around this C until the security guard came sprinting from the hospital at us


 Failed attempt at a pretty long nozza into the cella

 Nose many into broken rail tranny with Jason filming for YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE 2



 Junk Jam 2012 Hood niggas unite,
Down 2 fite.
Bitch niggas come
we need bikes
FUCK TCU -Skomar
 Chris riding the streetmod that I designed myself
 when we started at this spot no one was there... soon enough we were overrun by dozens of wack skaters... the majority of them were just skating the flat ground trying different flip tricks... go skate a parking lot or something you wackness
 We got kicked out juuuust as Chris landed his line for YHYC2
 This grandma was sooo angry she was continualy uttering cuss werds to herself about us while we left and she helped her grandson put his truck together... the grandpa just stood by peacefully and listened to her get more and more worked up over nothing
"Yo kid you ever ride cellas with that?" -Jason
DARIAN, JASON, and ERIC have all been stacking clips for the sequal to You Had Your Chance... look out for that shit, and watch the first video while your at it... and then show all your friends

World Premere: Cellaphone ...Unknown?


cellaphone unknown from jason byoun on Vimeo.
over the last few years jason byoun has been killin it actively pursuing the act of capturing TeamSAF's activitys .. recycle bin  TrSTash edit... one





safdsbconnection

Sunday, August 12, 2012

GET WELL SOON ERIC!!!

Eric's had a bad knee for a while now, but it was getting better until the other day when he landed on his knee/face/elbow. He went to the hospital, nothings broken... waiting to hear about MRI results. REALLY hopping for the best and a speedy recovery. I think/hope he's going to join the knee pad club with Matt and I once he's back on the bike.
 rail ride to manual gone wrong

 bounce